How to Get Rid of Those Pesky Houseflies

It’s that time of year again.

Flyswatters are useless when you get to be my age with such delayed reflexes. And who wants to expend the effort trying?

I have inadvertently discovered the secret to the intentional demise of flies that dare to invite themselves into your home.

Get them drunk!

Last evening I was having a glass of wine. Having been in and out of the house all day, I was aware that at least one uninvited flying guest had invaded my abode. It was of course making itself the usual nuisance around my person and anything edible that was exposed. Next thing I knew, the sucker dive-bombed straight into the wine! My first instinct was to dash it all down the drain. But I hesitated, thinking that that action might free the perpetrator from its liquid entrapment. So I “put a lid on it” and poured myself a new glass. 

This morning I confirmed that the culprit in custody had succumbed to its happy destiny, so I removed the lid on its liquid tomb. But seeing that there was yet another uninvited swarmer on the premises, I decided not to dispose of the deceased nor its means of death in hopes that it might entice another unsuspecting victim to uh, come to the party. 

Lo and behold, shortly, the deceased was joined by another of its species, who though it made a gallant try, was not able to free itself from its liquid hell—or heaven, as the case might be. That’s two for me; flies zero! 

This evening I came home to yet a third winged intruder. This one seemed to be on to the fact that two of its ilk floated lifelessly in the enticing amber pool. It played around the rim and even safer, the outside of the glass. So when it wasn’t um, “looking,” I sent the corpses to their rest down the garbage disposal. Thus reestablishing the untainted enticement (the empty glass with wine residue), before dessert, the third pest was also my captured prey!

I tell ya, this works, and it’s humane. Ya gotta think they died happy.

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    • Ann Smith
    • April 19th, 2011

    What a way to go! Are you going to keep a glass of wine on your counter all the time now?

    • Cora
    • April 18th, 2011

    LOL. Thanks for the visual. Question – does it matter if it’s red or white?

      • Paula Robertson
      • April 18th, 2011

      I shall do some more research and get back to you on that. 😉

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